these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
I just google mapped his house on satellite so i can really see how much money he has. Does that make me shallow?
i feel like barbie the morning after an elton john party
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
Oh, I'm just lighting tennis balls and WD-40 on fire, what are YOUUU doing?!
She ditched her BF in the library to come see me wasted at a house party and i still ended up banging that rugby chick instead.
Babysitting for someone you accidently sent nudies to is so fucking awkward.
She's currently upstairs fucking her boyfriend while I am downstairs making them a sex playlist watching her boyfriend's Weiner dog and large Boxer try and mount each other. Marvin Gaye is playing. This is the ultimate third wheel fail.
Could have been worst, could have seen me bent over biting her carpet while her son was inside me, i think i would have respnded with "i was just trying to be quiet"
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
I work nights. I sleep in. I take online classes. And fuck bad bitches. I'd say those are some perks to grad school.
I can't tell if this is a hangover or just a perfect combination of shame and regret
I am at 99 matches in less than 24 hours, I need a tinder rehab program
You act like tequila is some sort of sex juice
I have 4 more smokes and 6 more beers to go before I make a life changing decision like that.
Randomize
