i dont nkow, theres a guy slesping next to me and im wearing 8 tsthirts? wtf happened last night? will you come get me.
i think im in thre room next to you
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
No, dude. Even Jesus hates Creed.
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
I had to ask him for the scissors while I was in the shower. My hood piercing was stuck in my loofah.
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
Sudden realization: I dumped him because he was too immature, yet I am the one who moved back into my parent's basement post-breakup.
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
Let me get this straight, you're telling me to lower my standards? Even though last week you told me I don't have any..?
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
After a crazy night, morning sex is just trying to find a position where you can thrust without getting seasick.
if he ever tells me he loves me when we are sober, i am a goner. just fyi.
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
Sometimes you wanna cuddle and sometimes you wanna get blown in the bathroom.
i just turned on my printer and found 10 pounds of german chocolate inside. i think i found where you hid your candy last night
Randomize
