I accidentally had sex with my boyfriend's twin last night...and he didn't stop me.
How was it?
Fantastic, but that's not the point.
Last night while we were having sex, 'God bless the USA' started playing on his itunes. He came almost immediately... so awkward.
At the bar. Guy comes up wearing a hollister shirt and says "lets blow this popsicle stand"
You fucking left with him didn't you?!
I need to have sex with someone before he does. I need to win this break up!
My STD test came back clean. I'd like to thank all the guys I've slept with, they made this possible. I want to say thanks to all my friends, for believing in me living up to the full slut potential. And last but not least, I'd like to thank alcohol. I wouldn't be who I am today w/out you. I feel like I need to frame this...
Just stuffed an entire cupcake in my mouth after finishing third glass of wine. Valentines day is pretty much going how i expected it.
Survival tip #3: while you're hooking up with him, don't say he reminds you of his brother
I may wear a condom to jerk-off tomorrow knowing that my hand has touched surfaces in this bar.
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
I'm not going to pass up the opportunity to be half naked and covered in glitter without facing judgement or legal prosecution. I'll be there.
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
dude. I can hear the air.
I was just in the bathroom and some guy yelled all hail the king... i cant go anywhere without getting recognized anymore.
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
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