Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
I just got hit in the face by an old lady love handle.
She is totally STD
Is it a bad omen that my phone auto corrects dtf to STD
just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
Whatever. We're stealing a penguin. Your not allowed near him... You did this to yourself.
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
My penis has a 100% approval rating. He has never received a formal complaint. If you'd like to file one, you can go fuck yourself.
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
I'm not allowed to have sex with him again. My vagina joined in on the protest. There was a petition. All my body parts signed it.
Sext: Bring me pancakes from the midnight breakfast gathering please
You could woo kevin with a boquet of breakfast burritos. He loves those burritos. You could use the hot sauce packets like babies breathe
Crust to egg proportion prescribes to a pedantic form of quiche. It's like saying breakfast pizza isn't pizza at all.
...I just melted into my bed. I am one with the bed. I am 600 thread count.
Randomize
