what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
i'm sitting in the pool eating chicken pot pie with my little brother's friend. moments like these are the reason i love weed.
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
You drunk dialed me and told me to jump out of my second story window so I could give you head. I almost considered it.
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
how much ball-pain constitutes an emergency?
Oh my fucking god how fucking embarrassing never again will I mix drugs at a family barbecue
So, I had a dream last night that involved you as an actual cloaked Captain America and a lot of weird sex, and I didn't hate it.
He said he was a banker. Then he told me he made 15 an hour. I said he was a shitty banker then fucked his friend.
He’s over 6 feet has amazing posture and went to Harvard and has an awesome job and a great dick and loves Jesus and is an organ donor
Is this the guy you have listed as free food in your phone
Noooo he’s listed as free food #5
He wants to play improv games now whenever he gets drunk. Sometimes I just do not have the energy for that kind of a thing
Randomize