Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
At least my shower head will respect me in the morning.
I need to keep friends like you around just in case hell grades on a curve.
I got spanked with a cardboard tube. Apparently he used to be a percussionist. Who favored marching band tunes. It was weird.
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
Sweetie, don't go home with him. You can do so much better. Everyone else at the bar agrees.
If I puke off the kayak tomorrow think nothing of it.
We're going to work out tomorrow I guess but it usually consists of doing weights for 10 minutes, then saying fuck cardio and going to Taco Tuesday
I found him in the kitchen singing German metal into a banana while simultaneously mixing brownie batter. He didn't have any pants on.
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
I accidentally sent my dad a very explicit Star Wars fanfiction and he replied with "That was great!"
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
the cops drove by and you were on your back in the middle of the side walk with your arms and legs in the air yelling that you were a dead bug .
Her hot older sister walked in on us, looked me up and down, then stared straight at her and said "I call sloppy seconds on this one" then left. I'm still debating on how I feel about that.
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
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