So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
i bet if teenage jesus was here he would do a shot with me
You act like I'm friends with her or something. I only screw her boyfriend!
Oh yeah.
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
So im on with some ukrainian stripper for a vodka tasting tomorrow. If I die tell my family im awesome
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
"Work from home" is code for "morning drinks" right?
someone needs to name a hurricane after you
she doesn't even know what year it is. She just stumbles around life with a bottle of rum
The more I drank he just got hotter and hotter. And then the mustache didn't look too bad
I'm eating cereal out of a cocktail shaker. That kind of blizzard.
Every Easter every single one the baby Jesus butt plug comes up
I'm sorry I tried to spit drugs down your throat like a baby bird last night.
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