is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
he woke me up at 3 am to ask me where my plunger, a towel, and staples were. i'm afraid to go into my bathroom.
I bought a bottle of 100 proof for the storm. I am going to drink until I pass out. I'm taking bets. 1:30 pm is the over/under.
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
The other night after we fucked we talked about Lowe's vision insurance. Never fuck a coworker.
Are you asking me on a date where we get shithoused and do some fingerpainting?
Why is there a blood-covered "sorry about your stuff" note stapled to my door?
He started humming whilst eating me out. At first it was weird, but my new motto is now don't knock it before you've cum from it
we told the drug dealer that our car was dead and we needed a jump so he would bring the drugs to us...
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
You're up at 3AM, right? I have a very important question.
You know the Wendy's on route 6, by Kohls? Do you know if it has a drive through?
Yes it does.
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
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