Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
Last night he was fingering me with one hand to his ear, calling himself 'dj clittles'
Thats what happens when go home with guys that wear shutter shades to the bar..
when i told him i was pregnant with his baby he texted me 'congradulations'
i pity the fetus.
She transformed our coors light pitcher we stole from the bar into a fruit basket...
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
And if it was a miscarriage you should figure out whose it was. He must be an alphamale for his offspring to sustain life this long in the amusement park that is your body
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
My vagina just clenched in fear
Yeah but who says we can't be shitfaced and tan at the same time?
Have you ever realized how weird it is to think that you've fucked someone and don't know what their handwriting looks like?
What happened?
Vodka. Vodka happened.
A guy just threw up in my lecture of 500 ppl and just got up and walked away
Randomize
