Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
I can't wait to see you, I've been doing mouth stretches for the past 2 days
dinner is belligerent. she just poured the rest of the pitcher of margaritas into a take home box. people are staring.
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
Two things. 1 - I want to apologize for my drunkeness last night. 2 - I want to pre-apologize for my anticipated drunkeness tonight.
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
There is a girl in my drunk limo who hasn't seen an uncircumcised penis. Hook me up with a picture.
Fuck that. I will get OUT of CONTROL And rise from a hangover on Sunday like Jesus himself.
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
L'Shannah Tovah!
Whats that? My new stripper name?
I'm eating hummus off of my stomach right now.
woke up to a case of keystone on my porch when I went to bed at seven that morning.. I think it's someone's peace offering for getting my roommates car towed
You guys had reggaeton music playing while dry humping? Definition of romance.
It's not vacation until I get called "disgustinly sexy" by an fat woman whose older than my mother.
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
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