I need help removing her.
Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
I could end up kidnapped. Or worse, the night will be really awkward.
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
I just said "okay we have 20 minutes to get each other off, ready... Set... Go!" and he picked me up and threw me on the bed. I almost came just from that.
He said the first movie he ever jerked off to was Titanic because he knew "they were totally doing it in that car."
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
You can either drink his whiskey or be a bitch. Doing both is just mean.
I got really worried when i woke up and there weren't any missed booty calls from him between 3 and 5 am. Apparently his gf is in town ...
woke up with 4 bruises, 2 hickies and a bad case of rug burn. texans are dangerous.
Omg dude take a shower. You'll feel like god washed away all the sinful shit we did last night.
Randomize
