OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
Jesus can read your poker face... He is not pleased
Man THE POSTAL SERVICE is awesome when I'm high..... But they suck when I'm sober.
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
My room should be renamed "Land of the Misfit Condoms."
Dude idk, apparently telling two drunk chicks 'that's whats up' after watching them lick eachother's face wasn't the compliment they were looking for. I mean I was fucking hammered.
Wow.
my new ipod has external speakers and a video camera...all i can think about is how much more convenient it would be for me to make a pretty decent sex tape
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
i swear to god if you did anything to my honey bunches ill remove all the oats and shove them up your dickhole then play pinata with my foot to knock them all back out
I almost had sex at the fire station last night and I need you to acknowledge all the awesomeness that is in that sentence.
They say find what you're good at... Evidently that's showing up late for everything, drinking, and eating cheese for me.
Randomize
