That's the last time I fill my pockets with sushi.
trying to figure out who visited the hillshire farms website enough for it to be in my top sites.
At least he's not married... I hate Halloween hookups
I woke up to you in just boxers at my door at 7a.m. with you saying how many squrriels you counted on the walk back, then you made me penis shaped pancakes
I had some like war flashbacks of giving someone a handjob and i was trying to figure out who it was.
Too many sundays start with me waking up still drunk in my car.
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
drove into oncoming traffic. add a minute to my ETA
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
I could not actually bring myself to utter the phrase "donkey cock" in front of my father. Not possible.
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
If you need anything just hit me up
Pancakes
Noted.
How hard do you think it would be to make a drinking game out of a Slip-N-Slide? Asking for a friend.
I literally have a pirate chest of slutty clothing.
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
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