oh my god I didn't know your sister was this good at french kissing
i just realized Britney Spears and I are more alike than I thought. Both of us have our parents in complete control of our lives, we both have restraining orders on previous boyfriends, and we all know both of us can put on a hell of a show
You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
Handcuffed. To. Steering. Wheel. Fuck.
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
If I am going to pay someone to make me puke, it's going to be the bartender.
There's still flour in my hair. And I don't even want to know what the neighbors think happened infront of my house.
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
Also, no joke, I think that raccoon hair is still in my eye from last night.
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
Getting your clit pierced is not something you want to trust to a crazy girl with an ice cube, some vodka, and a sewing needle. Trust me. I learned that the hard way.
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
just ran into my father at CVS while buying condoms...he winked at me. I really need to move out of this town.
Intoxication Level: I'm as graceful and flawless as a fucking dinosaur.
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