we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
Idk man, it felt like my skin was a suit and I could feel it zipping up my side and up to my mouth. And then my head felt like a ventriloquist dummy's head, with the jaw thing..it was freaky, dude
You think that's a metaphor for anything, champ?
Shut the hell up.
why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
She's like Mona Lisa when she's intoxicated. No one understands her but they all think she's marvelous
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
I just noticed that when I sneeze...my nipples get hard.
i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
Its so hard looking at my mom and pretending I'm not dying a slow death of binge drinking
Drunk in my research methods class at 9:30 in the morning. We should do a quantitative analysis of my mimosa consumption.
I am both scared and jealous.
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
I say that because you at one point were like a mama spider covered with baby spiders only you were a man covered with strippers.
Found my bra in the fridge. See you in 10 mins. It's gonna be a good fuckin day!
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