I hope whoever gets these locks of love doesn't have a drug test anytime soon
birth control should be required to get into college
Please fuck him. And then let me tell her. And then let me protect you from the knife she pulls from her Ed Hardy purse. Please.
You make shower sex sound like waterboarding
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
hey i found one of your nipple clamps under my couch, i miss you!
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
I keep telling myself last night was not real, not real, not real. Then I remember I can't move. This hangover is too fucking real.
So he texted me two hours ago to tell me he just took two hits of acid. Now he's asking me if it's possible for a house to breathe.
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
Just sent my cousin to buy me a new bra cause mine is zip tied to a bar in the middle of nowhere Iowa
The REAL engagement ring is the jeweled butt plug.
can I CTRL ALT DELETE this universe
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