from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
we've decided to start cutting you off when you can't figure out how to work an ipod.
What are the signs of a concussion? Please don't freak out.
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
Was I holding a cat when you saw me? Because that was the height of that party for me.
You were so high you insisted on spoon feeding me your KFC bowl while I was driving.
Was who let the dogs out playing?
Ya. You started barking when it ended
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
it's always good to have a friend that's a hairdresser, a massage therapist, maybe throw in a lawyer just in case, and always have a friend on food stamps
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
This dude has batman tighty whities on over his cargo pants and he has the nerve to yell "fuck you bitch" up at my window.
I was mad at him...then I jerked off. Now I'm over it. Orgasms fix everything, I swear.
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
Let me just get through this whole court subpoena thing and then ill go back to buying alcohol for minors.
Randomize
