1:32a: I quit. signing up for eharmony. Don't judge
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
knew i was gonna lose at a shoe or be bleeding at some point. and both happened within 20 mins.
sorry can't make it tonight, greg's getting back from italy. he's had two weeks of carbs and no gym; now's my chance to get myself a piece of that newly-fat, low self-esteemed ass.
im drinking tequila tonight so will you babysit my bra?
They took my balls.
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
all i've had to eat today is leftover bday cake and a shot of tequila.
welcome to college.
In the morning he said my plan to make 2 casseroles today was, "hot in a grandma sort of way," & I didn't think it was weird. THAT'S how hot he was.
If all that ever happens between us is orgasms and dank memes, I think I'd be okay with that.
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when I get back.
Randomize
