i just realized i've been trying to levitate the potatoe chip out of her hand for the past ten minutes. i think i smoked to much.
When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
I hope God doesn't listen to everybody on a Saturday night.
no one will drink with you if you continue to listen to beyonce
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
you were cooking a hot pocket with a grill lighter what did you want me to do
she was puking red wine out the car window, telling me about how shes joining weight watchers tomorrow, not okay.
I cannot be this high in this house. This house has so many of my secrets in its walls.
This is classic penis vs brain.
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
I am the worst person to have nipple rings I'm hanging ornaments off of then and sending everyone a tits the season to be jolly
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
MANY MANY THINGS AND MOST OF THEM ARE YOUR FUCKING FAULT
I've turned into a small time drug dealer, now who's the real MVP.
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
He fucked me so hard my contacts fell out! Didnt know that was possible.
Randomize
