Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
I look like a sausage in jean shorts, you should have woken up earlier and approved my outfit.
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
the amount of times i have wished for a boxed wine emoticon is almost alarming. almosttt
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
I guess birthday shots aren't always the answer
My roommate made me a peanut butter and sprinkles sandwich. Maybe tonight isn't that bad
On 3 separate occasions, she grabbed my bullhorn to announce to the entire party she had fucked me.
I just yelled at my mom for getting me circumcised without my permission. That drunk
Jake bring pizza.
JAKE BRING PIZZA.
Sneaking the vodka in was the easy part.. listening to medley of puking in the porta pottys was not
Just delivered a pizza to a holiday inn and a delivery driver from Me n Ed's walked up at the same time, we both were going to the same floor so we stood in the elevator making small talk about delivery stuff, but a small part of me wanted to deck him, stand over him and shout,"FOR THE HUT MOTHERFUCKER, FOR THE HUT!"
Jesus christ, don't start a pizza delivery gang war.
We laughed, we cried, we fucked, we shirked our familial and work related responsibilities. They could make a movie about the last 40 hours of our lives.
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
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