sorry I missed your bday party.,I was vid chatting with that new guy I'm talking to all night...happy biirthday though
I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
she lunged for my junk like it was the cure for swine flu
I found him crying and drunk, in my closet holding a picture of Tyler Perry. He managed to say"he's just so many people"
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
She thinks she's a fairy, dude. A real fucking fairy with wings and shit.
Did you seriously take investment advice from our coke dealer?
Okay wait let me power puke and then we can go dancing
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
You told us that you were going to become a 'new man' and threw your tv set out of a window.
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
all I want for my birthday is booze and sex toys. don't bother calling if neither of those are included.
I woke up in a boat, with a life jacket on, tons of beer cans and no lake... I was inside a garage. WTF
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