1:57 a.m. Where did you go???
1:58 a.m. What are you doing? I want to go home with you, why aren't you responding?
2:11 a.m. Heading back to your place now, will you let me in?
party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
I cockslap morals
i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
This pizza tastes like mashed potatoes. HOW HIGH DO YOU THINK I AM?
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
Showering in my swimsuit in hopes of getting the beer smell out.
I'm starting to think I didn't bring enough liquor for this family Christmas.
It's 2 pm....
You fucked that MILF against my car!
How would you know?
She scratched her name into my window with her bigass wedding ring. btw she wants you to call her
He snorted adderall on my table. I have a feeling he's not trying to buy me flowers
I just came rly close to telling a dude that I want to chew on him and there should be an oil painting of his ass up in the louvre before I realized that isn't how flirting is supposed to go
I'm going to reward myself for having sex with coffee and a breakfast burrito.
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
i am no longer ashamed when i walk into the dining hall for sunday brunch and i'm greeted with applause for suriving my weekend
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