you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?
Just saw my father's penis. Don't know what to say.
oh my god i'm in a crawl space
I got stoned in my snow covered car and pretended I was burried alive
I'm putting you on my Emergency card so i can spend the last ounce of strength in my hospital bed to flip you off.
Dan I was a mess I made out with a 40 yr old who gave me a wad of cash for Christmas. Like wtf
Just specific performance'd my way into her pants. I literally said specific performance and that shit worked. Thanks B. Law!
Do u like your dick pics shot in hotdog or hamburger orientation?
Why are you there anyways?
Pickin up ball pit balls from craigslist
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
Everything isn’t always sunshine & rainbows. Sometimes there’s tequila.
You were so fucked you introduced me to a pile of Laundry
I wondered why I slept in the front room
I am putting clothes on to go find a brownie
In my experiences, brownies are better naked.
No reason. My tongue went numb after one shot. I may die tonight
Randomize
