I'm in a room alone pouting because I got the wrong nachos at taco bell.
Help i just walked in on mom blowing dad
took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
she's sitting here naked with heels and a taco.
my dad just told me he found me on the kitchen floor saturday morning with a microwave dinner on top of me, fork still in hand. priceless
I don't know how we managed to stay up but we actually sat in front of her open refrigerator for god knows how long while she ate salami straight out of the package with her fingers and I laughed. It was a trainwreck.
Passing out on a toilet is not classy no matter what you're wearing. Not even a pea coat.
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
I walk into the pharmacy and I'm like "I need three morning after pills" and the guy was like "uhhhh". All I said was "we didn't plan it, we all just got laid the same night"
At 10 PM you were shit faced in the kitchen makin nachos... Naked. I wasn't sure what to do besides walk away...
I'm gonna go take a shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
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