So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
maybe i'll see you again later :)
I'd rather shit a knife.
it's like a walk of shame rule, you always run into someone who saw you wearing that yesterday
Woke up with a full plate of KFC next to my face. I didn't really question it.
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
Omg just opened my passenger side door and my outfit from last night is on the floorboard.
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here
Getting drunk at 9 am is not a super power.
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
I brought her cheeseburgers and tequila but she's still mad at me.
If I end up in the hospital remind me to order jimmy johns.
Why?
They deliver.
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
Randomize
