Dude if I didn't piss myself last night I dont think I would have woke up in time for work.
Friend I haven't seen in almost a year just IMed me to let me know that my mom stuck her boob out the window on the freeway at her.
Her mom responded by mooning my mother. I really don't know what's worse.
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
Only you could be admitted to the ER and walk out with a nurse's phone number. I wish I was gay
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
when seducing a hipster, do you think taking a nude pic on a lomo-camera app would increase my chances? grainy off-colored boobs and telling him how much i like reading salinger?
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
I know I've wanted to fuck him for the past month, but when you're that hungover, the only chemistry you have is with a pillow and a gallon of water.
So some drunk guy just tried to convince me with all of his passion that bacon is a color
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
He wore a t-shirt that had an arrow pointing to his crotch and "DO IT FOR THE VINE" on it.
At least he's honest about how long he'll last.
Then, even the devil himself would be scared of us. And we'd be bestfriends with Jesus. He would love us.
I don't know who he was but he was covered up with a shower curtain and ate a whole bottle of tums
Randomize
