At some point I made a semi-conscious decision that i was okay with sleeping in my own vomit.
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
You kept trying to hail an ambulance
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
you know it's a good party when the fucking floor caves in. THE FUCKING FLOOR.
we came into the house to find you doing shots by your self and when we told you to stop you locked yourself in the bathroom...
did I at least say anything...
you meowed at us and said you're a cat and cats drink for a living
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
He was nothing but deer-caught-in-headlight eyes and dick, it was adorable
How does one acquire holy water?
There's a burrito next to my bed. Did you buy it for me or is the Chipotle fairy real? And why am I naked?
The guy who said he's gonna suck your butthole till your face caves in is at Maggie's
Haha just talked to the dude you bit on Thursday. He has been growing a beard to hide the bruising....
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