I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
He cooked the food on a paper plate in the oven.
the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
FB needs to have a relationship status called...screwing my roommates bf..linking their names would be an easier to tell her!
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
Your expertise in crazy bitches is needed.
I had 5 long islands and 2 alien brain hemorrhages…I am entirely certain that the "power hour to finish the night" idea was just too much.
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
there's cocaine on the ipad again........... was your sister here last night?
I don't know if should be sitting on a toilet or kneeling in front of it
You had 10 drinks. On a first date.
I just masterbated then started bawling.
Honestly I was sitting in managerial accounting thinking "I really need to get my shit together and stop drinking so much wine." But when you asked I realized... it's wine. It's always a yes.
The only reason I know his name is because we wrote marriage vows in orange crayon on the back of a Walmart receipt.
I think I passed out drunk at my own jewelry party
Randomize
