i havee beer in my backseat and a glow in the dark condom in my cleaveage.
you're going for the gold here.
i just bought ciggarettes using my court citation as id. I've reached an all time low.
I climb out of my sunroof. I mean its kind of embarrassing but part of me feels awesome and ninja like.
I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
you tried to clear everyones facebook status so that yours would be the only one on everyones home page
I'm sweating while I eat mac and cheese. That fat.
We forgot to go back and get the brick YOU WANTED TO BRING INTO THE BAR?
Meeting relatives from another state drenched in tequila and smelling of weed. I'm gonna kill you for soaking the only bra I brought in Jose Cuervo Gold.
I'm in the "I'd rather have Carbs than Dick phase" part of my Life right now. YOU tell me how much Skinny Sex I'm having.
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
Theres either a bag of coke in my pocket or a bag of anthrax, either way last night got way to serious
Just copped mushrooms from a dude in a business suit. U comin or what?
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
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