They have to be talking about me. I never heard that statement until I was born.
I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
im flying all the way to minnesota to see him for four days... cutest-best-friend-reunion or most-epic-booty-call-ever?
who says it cant be both...
It's kind of sad that your greatest accomplishment today is that you stood up and didn't fall down.
I was just on craigslist and saw and ad for a naked yoga instructor. I will no longer be jobless.
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
I have no idea what's going on.... I just want to wear my horse sweatshirt and drink vodka.
Im dating a 38 year old who's lap I can fit in. Tell me I don't have daddy issues.
Want to run by the liquor store later? Tequila Youn should really be in attendance at Party Mountain. No one else could be our spirit animal.
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
I JUST HAD A FLASH MEMORY OF DOING A SHOT OF WHISKEY WITH MY BEER YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO PUNCH ME IN THE FACE TO PREVENT THAT FROM HAPPENING.
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
I’m lazy so obviously looking like a rotisserie chicken is my favourite position
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