i was rollin on her like bob the builder
had another sex dream about alec baldwin...
I don't think a check that has "thx for the drugs" on the note is really gonna fly.
While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.
Of course my walk of shame coincided with the alumni marathon on campus. But, I did get a thumbs up from the woman handing out water.
I'm crying, drinking alone and applying for jobs tonight. I figure the alcohol will lower my job standards.
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
It's funny when you can't take a fishing boat because you fucked the captains wife
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
Found your bra
Where?
Hanging in the tree
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
Randomize