What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
he bonged a 1/5 of jack and came back an hour later blacked out with a legitimate chicago firemans helmet
i just unblacked out cuddled in a pita pit booth with ten dollars rubberbanded to my hand.
No need to call an exterminator, the ants overdosed on the leftover lines on the counter.
While I faked being asleep, he literally prayed to God out loud, asking for forgiveness for losing his virginity before marriage.
She looked at me and said "i like penises." and then passed out with her condom balloon animal in her hands.
The stoned girl at the dining hall just handed me a single chicken wing and insisted that she's "unable to procure more rations"
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
this whole "benign brain tumor" is truly a blessing in disguise. I almost want to start bringing MRIs to the bar because sympathy pussy is flowing like the nile
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
I've spent hours masturbating before. It's actually my favorite Sunday activity
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
you bounced a quarter off my butt and it came back hitting you in the eye. karma, bitch.
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Randomize
