Just saw a midget shotgun a coors light
to be honest..when i was little i used to think sharks can swim out of drains and eat people
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
There was a punch bowl full of straight vodka. Glass bowl, ladle, vodka, and no punch at all. It was something of a rough night
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
I left two hundred in singles in your car sorry about the mess
The last thing I remember is trying to split my bridesmaid dress down the back like the incredible hulk.
and you succeeded.
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
We need to get her a baby shower present. And no, a blow up sex doll with her dead boyfriends picture stuck to it, is not appropriate.
It's just good to know that when I drink like a twenty year old I still act like one.
Hey can you send me a pic of your breast with a peace sign in the photo? I'm trying to win a scavenger hunt contest. Thanks so much
You just kinda wondered into the street and started screaming at dogs and small children...
he asked if he should bring the trash can into the room.. apparently i shoved my finger all over his face and said.. shhhh dont talk... just take your pants off.
I am a unicorn in a field of flowers, you asshole.
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