we were having sex in the shower and he dropped me. try explaining THAT to your concerned little brother
mrs. f**** your sons in jail, if you can help with bail please respond, if not please dont tell him i told you.
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
everytime she opens her mouth i wish that i was deaf
Whoever had sex in my bed during the party last night left a glow in the dark condom on my floor. I'm not even mad anymore, I just want to know who it is so they can tell me where to get one.
She vajazzled her vag. It was as useless as putting earrings on chewbacca
Bad news. Pictures just stimulated my memory and i just realized the stripper I hooked up with this weekend tasted like pizza.
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
Just saw a tranny in a skimpy captain america costume walking around campus. Going to follow her. You gotta see this
Well I just walked into a wedding reception and im currently eating a cannoli in the men's room while pissing
I'm ordering dildos in a santa hat. You?
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
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