yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
atleast your grandma didn't give you her USED dildo just so you wouldn't have sex.
My New Years Resolution was to get a girl I dont know pregnant. 8 months later I can check that off the list..
i think at one point throughout the night i began eating birthday cake with a q-tip.
Well we were just driving down the street, there was a realtor and a couple walking up the porch of a house for sale, mark sticks his head out, opens his mouth to say something, pukes all down the side of the car, pauses, and yells "THIS IS A PHENOMAL NEIGHBORHOOD YOURE GONNA LOVE IT"
I made weed fried chicken. What have you done today?
Next thing I know we're all standing in the kitchen holding hands and thanking God for the beer.
That's like lying to my vagina. I can't betray it like that.
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
Can I come take down that wallpaper yet? I stopped seeing that dude and I need to occupy my time with something besides getting drunk at bingo night and cussing out old people. Also, i'm not sure on the legal stipulations but I might have, unintentionally, committed grand theft auto at some point.
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
You told everybody that you were a dragon and then projectile vomited all over the kitchen.
Nxt time we drink that much, we'll have to hide the crayons. Crayola-ing a mural on the living room wall wasnt the brightest idea, but it sure is classy. Right?
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
Randomize
