If it has a penis then it will be stupid. Just how it works.
I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
we made a giant pot of alcholic jello. i filled a gallon bag and brought it to dorms. desk guy gave me weird looks, he doesnt realize this is how i will pass all of my room searches
Ah, the precious few moments between when i wake up and when i realize why i'm sleeping on a treadmill.
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
So after I was tied with a feather boa he left me there with KFC and cherry coke
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
My dad caught me fucking in the pool last night. He proceeded to tell me I needed to "quiet things down" while this guys dick was still in me. Worst daughter ever.
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
He just told an 8 year old to go fuck himself so we probably won't be in the butterfly exhibit much longer.
I don't know what his name was or what he looked like, but I remember him rocking me to sleep with his cock
I think I’ve reached sophomore-year-level of bad ideas
and you know that’s the highest possible level because it’s when I met you
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