he just sent me a friend request on facebook. i wish it were physically possible to vomit on him through the internet.
If God's watching us, we might as well be entertaining
they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
I consider any night I don't make out with someone a bad night. So I've been great.
My girlfriend is pregnant with her exs baby. 2014 just became the worst year
I told him that I wanted his dick like I wanted a jumbo hot dog. There something wrong with my priorities
Omg my butt feels so much better. Those suppositories are magic. It feels like Jesus fingered me in my sleep.
Yeah, I got home from work at like 9:30, and he was passed out on the couch wearing only a tee shirt and The Jurassic Park theme on repeat.
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
Randomize
