thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
Nick had a break down & said to me "Everybody's mad at me, I'm the douchebag, Im the fucking douchebag that everyone hates, Do you wanna come home with this douchebag?!"
You're going home with him aren't you?
I'll see ya in the morning when I leave his house
I would have been "that girl" at the party last night if it wasn't for that girl who puked in the potted plant...
I hope whoever gets these locks of love doesn't have a drug test anytime soon
i suspect the closest i'll get to a valentine this year is a 16 year old on chat roulette asking me to show my tits. step up from last year, i guess.
Umm you don't wanna know how many "I'm sorry for calling you last night" fb wallposts I just had to write...
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
I walked in on him fucking my best friend. I think we've reached the point of following each other on twitter.
just shotgunning some tallboys in the cooler, you?
HOW DO YOU GET RAISES EVERY TWO WEEKS?!
I was gonna jerk off, but then I thought about that movie last night and it killed that idea. I have serious boner trauma.
I'm going to need a penis the size of a bat
I woke up in a boat, with a life jacket on, tons of beer cans and no lake... I was inside a garage. WTF
Randomize
