Yeah i wasn't gonna go out but then i was like im not gonna get my dick wet stayin at home studying
he was so drunk he doesn't remember anything. I have to break up with him all over again
Having sex with the stobe light on was the best bad idea I've ever had.
Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
I should have known our good time had gone to shit when his ankle bracelet started flashing.
He said that he doesn't like skittles. This relationship is over an it hasn't even started yet.
xanax give me strength to not ask where we stand with booty calls
I woke up with my shoes still on and my pants around my ankles cause I couldn't get them over my shoes
you just won the triple crown of sex! your prize is more sex.
wtf guys I thought we agreed on no more knives. So much for not destroying the house
I hate csi yet I find myself watching a full marathon. I am also eating hotdog buns stuffed with barbecue chips and they are quite tasty
Steven and I talked about running for office again today. It's fucked that my 3 dream jobs are marijuana bakery owner, bar owner, and president.
The guy i took home was a circus freak. He jerked off 3 times in front me after we had sex. And he came every time.
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