The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
Fun fact: when I ripped off my wristband, I punched myself in the face. Rad
i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
it's not cheating when I paid for it
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
Going to eat lunch. Bunch of people in church clothes, and we are hungover, wearing pajamas, and in real danger of puking on the floor. We're about to destroy the ambience of this joint.
today is my dealer's birthday. i dont know whether to give him the day off or call him saying happy birthday ill take a quarter please
Someone apparently named 'eleaw' just text me asking if I had fun last night.
please come home... she's showing me videos of spanish parrots and is telling me about her dead cousin...
There is a really great story behind the missing Coco Puffs and vodka mystery
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
Taco Bell is giving high school kids free tacos STEAL YOUR BROTHER'S WALLET I'LL BRING THE WEED.
My professor just paused class to answer a phone call from her dog. Im taking shots before this class from now on.
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
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