did we hook up?
no, because you kept repeating "itty bitty titties" when i took off my shirt
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
you told me your penis was albino and it couldnt be exposed to light so you needed to keep it in me
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
i may have reached my "but im high so it's cool" quota for the month.
Not a single person will look me in the eye. Last night must've been bad.
Yelling drunk tank or bust at a cop, not a good idea
He didn't dress up but kept finding random pieces of costumes on the floor at each club. He was an 80s hair band warrior at the end of the night.
Today is definitely a "stand over the toilet and pee through the opening at the bottom of my boxers" kind of day.
I guess the silver lining is that having a big dick really comes in handy when you're hungover.
It's a mixed blessing.
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
How was my night? He had a picture of his mom on his night stand and he yelled "Papi like" when he came. Fuck tequila.
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
Okay, so is being determined to have my vagina licked by a woman on Valentine's day an acceptable goal?
The stripper started talking about murdering people....that lapdance turned dark.....
Randomize
