we were having sex in the shower and he dropped me. try explaining THAT to your concerned little brother
dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
He was like a Bill Nye the science guy of sex....he was telling me things about my clitoris that I didn't even know
Why is your signature on my underwear?
I keep reminding myself that my vagina isn't a homeless shelter.
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
He needs a high five right to the fucking mouth. With a chair. Or an atomic bomb.
Jumanji is 1000% better stoned while cooking breakfast.
2 hours later, she made her cat watch the waterfall scene from Homeward Bound to teach her how good she has it here.
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.
You were licking skittles to check if they were "halucinateizers" so no, you are not leaving the house while on antibiotics.
Randomize
