hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
I can't do a walk of shame with a sombrero full of baby chickens
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
Next time you're baked eat baked beans and potato chips together. Like dip them in the beans. It's so good
Well I'm going to San Francisco next weekend for pride. I'm sure I'll end up drunk and on a beach at some point.
I'm about to be a GTA V widow, he could at least throw me a bone. Literally.
Holy shit, just saw a girl in the library smoking a bong disguised as a calculator
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
Please tell me I made it home with both shoes on
Nope
I can't hang out tomorrow. A boy wants to feed me ice cream and touch my boobs. Priorities.
All I'm wearing right now is a condom and a sock.
Just one?
Yup. One sock.
He kept saying "Welcome to Indianapolis" over and over while we were having sex...because that's his hometown. I was scared and confused... I didn't know if I should have said thank you or what.
Can I come over?
Sorry I gave up dick for lent. Hit me up on Good Friday tho
Randomize