I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
this wart on my finger ripped off while i was fingering this girl the other night. she thought she had gotten her period and started crying so i went with. its better for both of us that way
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
she was so "full of love" from watching twilight that she came over and gave me a handjob. when does the next movie come out?
I'm at a free clinic. Feel like I should cough or sneeze so it's not blatantly obvious I'm getting checked for STI's.
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join?
I just remembered I did the whole byebyebye dance at the bar
He's attempting to seduce me with thanksgiving-themed sexual metaphors... It's working.
Taking dicks and breaking hearts, no better life
Okay so it turns out that my bf keeps a log of every time I sleep-fart. It's dated back to 2013.
I have to sleep with him. We're too much alike. It's like clash of the titans, except instead of clashing, he's putting it in me.
So, do I need to remind you to keep it classy tonight?
No, because if you have to be reminded it isn't classy.
Feel free to drag me back to reality at your convenience
Randomize
