I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
Beer vodka and pink lemonade powder mixed together. So. Many. Penises. My vagina will be calling out to them tonight. Coooooooooooooome.
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
I feel like I just lived out a children's book called "The Day I Went to Law School Stoned"
We are buying drugs from a guy with a Jesus fish on his dodge caravan.
He said the first movie he ever jerked off to was Titanic because he knew "they were totally doing it in that car."
I am going to buy some m-80's and keep a bucket of them in the bathroom. That way I can just depth charge the toilet before each time I use it. Lets see how those snakes like cheap Chinese explosives
I feel like my dick pic collection should be archived at the Smithsonian
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
Nothing to be ashamed of. I bet Oprah has sharted.
Yes, ur purse got stole with our condo keys in it but my slut ass saved us and we had a place to stay, AND I got to choke a motherfucker while riding him. Thats taking one for the team.
If I end up in the hospital remind me to order jimmy johns.
Why?
They deliver.
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
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