I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
the fact that my dorm room overlooks a children's daycare is enough initiative for me to have safe sex.
I was to drunk to walk in jimmy john's so I called and got a pickle delivered to me outside the bar , too much?
just used my sex toy cleaning solution to clean my reading glasses. midterms are cramping my styleeee
I misunderstood what a furry was. Come pick me up.
I almost spit out my drink. But only almost, because it was vodka. And you don't spit out vodka.
No more morning sex. Just for once, my vagina would like to go to work bone-dry and bone-free.
Our Tuesday night drunk Irish step dancing was on point tonight.
Just got referred to as "the girl from Tuesday night" at the Taco Bell drive thru...what happened on my birthday?!
March Madness means a buffet of emotionally vulnerable dick at the bars almost every night. So yeah my vagina and I are big fans.
he rolled over in the morning and told me happy valentines day. i don't even know his first name.
Randomize