i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
I've eaten ice cream, mentos, an extreme gulp and swedish fish today. i feel like diabetes. the actual disease not a person with it.
Have u ever been so drunk that pissing urself felt like a better idea than walking to the bathroom? I entered those waters last night
Dude I thought this was going to suck, but moving back in with my dad is like being at a frat party every night only everyone is 40 years old.
george bush was a better president for first pitches than barack obama. there. i said it.
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
Ya, found out why there were rat traps in my bed. Guess I pissed in Sams room so he went to the store and got them and put them on my bed and put tabasco in his humidifier and put it in my room
As soon as they started using chocolate milk as a chaser for captain Morgan, I thought l it'd be best to leave.
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
There are Vine videos that have lasted longer than he did
hey dude my crackhead idol just taught me a great way to tie shoes
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
Dude, you can't drink while watching Star Trek. You hardly understand it sober.
It's an alien shaped cup though. i think that'll help me absorb.
I just want to see his penis in the light. Is that a crime?
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