Porn is love you can see.
Funny, I didnt know that facebook statuses were for crappy song lyrics
just threw all of the fireworks into the bonfire. thats why there are firetrucks.
I told him he didn't want "flip-flop extraction" on his medical history.
Did you really end last night's sexting with "Stay thirsty my friend"?
how are things with the new girl?
good, we have nothing in common but she likes being choked
Halfway through he got an idea for a short story so he wrote it in magic marker on my boobs. Yeah, he's a keeper.
I ended up at these random girls' house they are smoking weed out of a gun
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
Almost just bought a peacock. I need to get off Craigslist
His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night
Brett got me a cake with a pic of me shitting
took shots off of a myriad of fake boobs last night. It was glorious.
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
nothing like a long car ride to make you think of all the bad things you've done
Randomize
