i felt like cinderella. except at midnight i turned back into a whore.
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
I tried to throw up out of my window but I forgot there was a mesh screen.
He saw my tits then looked up and yelled thank you jesus as loud as he could
consequently i now know what mace tastes like
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
New low: falling asleep with my face in the toilet only to be awoken when my hand slid down and touched the water. It's moments like these I wish I could forget.
Literally just saw a 7 year old intently rub his penis on the metro. I'm not ready for this
Dude. I've been high for so many hours now that I'm just accepting this as my new reality.
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
gonna guess the empty vodka bottle and open can of tuna in the bathroom drawer are related?
He fucked me while wearing his night time breathing machine mask. Does this mean I joined the dark side and he is Darth Vader?
I may or may not have tried to give myself a lobotomy
when she didn't finish her burrito you wanted to call the cops because you said it was neglect
I'm just going to use my debit card. I feel bad buying pizza with the money I stole from my roommate...so I'm going to put it in my piggy bank.
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