a hangover this bad deserves a feeding tube
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
Have the decency to NOT HANG YOU'RE USED CONDOM ON THE FOOSEBALL HANDLES! Dickhead.
Fun Fact: I do not remember what its like to be sober between drinking off and on for two weeks at my "vacation" and being on painkillers for my mouth now
So they just told me that while I was being loaded into the ambulance the cop told them if they were good friends they'd post it on Facebook...
The subtweets were good enough
Buffalo PD walked in my bedroom this morning at 7 am. Was still blackout drunk, fully dressed, Steak Out wrapper on the floor, parking meter on the floor of the bar room. 'Both of your doors were wide open, wanted to make sure no one was robbing you.' Then I made a pass at her.
The night went downhill when he took his pants off at our table and walked up to women saying "Special delivery"
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
you never un-have a 4some
Just showed my drunk fiancé where I got circumcised, she's been crying for twenty minutes.
You act like tequila is some sort of sex juice
I feel like my foot is being amputated. Or maybe it's the vodka. I couldn't tell you.
I found condoms in the back yard from you and your boyfriend. My house isnt a motel
There are leaves in my underwear?
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
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