I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
Just had the moment before I realised I'd packed you off in an ambulance last night after funnel-feeding you Monster and vodka. Your mom thinks I'm a dick doesn't she?
I just got peed on. This karma circle is starting to get vicious.
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
I definitely pole-danced a parking meter outside a party last night. The cheering was appreciated.
i took four shots of tequila, threw my fist up in the air, then went around the party showing everyone how to do the ninja turtle handshake. that's the last thing I remember
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
Random question, what's John-that-we-had-a-threesome-with's phone number? Don't necessarily need the full number, maybe just area code? Think I drunkenly ran into him last night and now I have texts from a John.
walked into my room this morning clutching two empty bottles of sminoff to find my roommate's ultra conservative parents staring at my posters of naked men. fuck parents weekend.
Randomize
