Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
Give him a trash can and a welcome home balloon, he will be good.
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
I got laxative. And a toothbrush. Because who wants to buy just laxative on a Friday night?
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
I know I joke about running from my problems a lot but I'm 3 miles off-campus and need a ride
He was walking around and kept offering the neighbors flamingo lawn ornaments shots of vodka.
Well, if I’m not getting dick or sleep then I’m not interested.
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
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